“As he’s gotten older, he’s gained more empathy—and he’s quite sensitive,” Tana tells PEOPLE in this week’s cover story

As Gordon Ramsay has gotten older, “he’s gained more empathy,” says wife Tana. “And he’s quite sensitive.”

Tana, 49, met Gordon, 56, when she was 18, “way before any of this happened,” as she puts it. The two tied the knot in 1996 and have been happily married for 26 years.

“I remember when I first met him—and I was actually dating one of his friends—I said, ‘Oh my God, he’s so arrogant,’ because it’s always his voice you heard. He was always the one riling everyone up. In that respect, he has not changed at all. It’s just gotten more obvious,” she says. “But at the same time, he is, believe it or not, incredibly sensitive—he’s a crier.”

That emotional side has come with time—and their expanding family, which includes daughter Megan, 25, twins Jack and Holly, 23, daughter Matilda (“Tilly”), 21, and son Oscar, 4.

“When your kids get to a certain age and they start achieving what they really want to do, it’s a big deal. And he shows it,” says Tana. “We go long periods of time when we don’t have all the kids home, and then when we are all together having dinner, Gordon will say, ‘It’s really nice to have everyone here.’ And they’re like, ‘Oh God, watch out! He’s going to cry!’ We laugh a bit because it’s a soft side that no one would expect him to have.”

Tana and Ramsay credit their lasting love to strong communication and making time for each other even if it’s just “a drive in the car,” says Ramsay. “What comes out on our walks and hikes on weekends is incredible.”

“It sounds really cliché, but as long as you’re friends, as long as you kind of like each other, it’s going to be good,” adds Tana.

The family’s home base is in the London borough of Wandsworth, but Ramsay, Tana and Oscar often travel to L.A., where they have a house, during filming.

“The three of us are always together, and that upsets the other four,” Ramsay says. “We say, ‘Hey, you’ve had your time with Mom and Dad! It’s Oscar’s time.’ ”

When they’re apart, says Tana, “Gordon likes to phone about 25 times a day.”

“When it comes to our busy schedules, people say, ‘It must be hard having to be apart so often,’” she says. “It is, but I feel really lucky that I still get butterflies when we haven’t seen each other for a few weeks. I never want to take that for granted—even with all these kids to worry about. We have a lot of fun.”