Love Done Right: Justin Hartley on Why a Natural Flow in Marriage Matters

Justin Hartley, who was previously married to Selling Sunset’s Chrishell Stause, has opened up about his relationship with Sofia Pernas, who he tied the knot with in March earlier this year. In an interview with Haute Living, the This Is Us star reflected on married life with Sofia, saying, “It’s incredible when you’re not forcing things. It doesn’t have to be that hard. You just meet the right person and you just go, ‘Oh, this is amazing. It’s just so wonderful!’” He added that “Even though [they’ve] only been married a few months, it’s hard to remember what it was like without [Sofia],” explaining that, “When I re-met her, I just knew.

“It’s so interesting about the human heart and human mind. It’s not a codependency; I’m just at peace with myself. I feel loved and I feel appreciated. I know she feels the same way. We just have a really great relationship and a really terrific family.”
His comments come following a highly-publicised divorce from Chrishell Stause, who he was married to for two years between 2017-19. Chrishell discussed her reaction to finding out about Justin and Sofia’s wedding, saying (during an episode of Selling Sunset):

“My ex-husband Justin is remarried to someone I know from back in the day, pretty well, and a lot of things made sense after finding that out. I wish them the best. You know, I think that actually, if anything, it felt good to know that. It felt like a little bit of closure.”
Following the divorce, Chrishell went on to date her co-star Jason Oppenheim. However, the pair recently announced that they’re going their separate ways, with Chrishell citing their “ideas for family ultimately not being aligned” as the reason behind the split.

In Justin’s interview with Haute Living, he also explained that when he first met Sofia, he only saw her as a coworker, saying he wasn’t “available.” “You meet in different capacities. We didn’t work together that closely, and we didn’t work together that long,” Justin explained. “I knew that she was very kind and very nice. I liked being around her. “But I was in a different place in my life. I wasn’t available. Timing has a lot to do with that. I’m very lucky to not only have found ‘the one,’ but I found her when she was available and the timing was right.”

Marriage is a journey filled with ups and downs, and for actor Justin Hartley, the key to a happy and fulfilling relationship is simple: don’t force it. The “This Is Us” star recently opened up about his views on marriage, emphasizing the importance of a natural and effortless connection. But what does this mean for couples in real life? Let’s dive deep into Hartley’s philosophy on love and explore why forcing things in a relationship may do more harm than good.

Who is Justin Hartley?

Before we get into his marriage philosophy, let’s take a quick look at Justin Hartley’s journey. The actor is widely known for his roles in popular TV shows like “This Is Us,” “Smallville,” and “The Young and the Restless.” Beyond his successful acting career, Hartley has also been in the spotlight for his personal life, including his highly publicized divorce from Chrishell Stause and his new marriage to Sofia Pernas.

“Marriage is Incredible When You’re Not Forcing Things” – What Does It Mean?

Justin Hartley’s statement speaks volumes about how relationships should evolve naturally. But what exactly does he mean by not forcing things? Let’s break it down:

  • A Natural Connection – Love should flow effortlessly, without feeling like a constant battle.
  • No Pressure to Conform – Every relationship is unique; trying to fit into a societal mold can cause unnecessary strain.
  • Mutual Growth – When both partners grow together organically, the relationship becomes stronger and more fulfilling.

The Dangers of Forcing a Relationship

1. Creates Unnecessary Stress

When couples try too hard to make things work, it can lead to unnecessary stress and tension. Love should feel comfortable, not like a job.

2. Leads to Resentment

Forcing things often results in one partner feeling unheard or pressured, which can build resentment over time.

3. Stifles Individual Growth

A healthy relationship allows both partners to grow individually. If you’re too focused on “making it work,” you might lose sight of your personal development.

4. Reduces Authenticity

Relationships thrive on authenticity. If you’re constantly adjusting yourself to fit an ideal, you’re not being true to yourself or your partner.

Signs You Might Be Forcing a Relationship

1. Constant Fights Over the Same Issues

If you find yourself repeatedly arguing over the same problems, it could be a sign that the relationship isn’t as natural as it should be.

2. Feeling Drained Instead of Energized

A healthy relationship should bring joy and energy, not leave you feeling emotionally exhausted.

3. You’re Trying to Change Each Other

If you’re always trying to “fix” your partner, you might be forcing something that isn’t meant to be.

4. Lack of Mutual Effort

A balanced relationship involves equal effort. If one person is always pushing while the other resists, it may not be a good fit.

How to Let a Relationship Flow Naturally

1. Focus on Communication

Open and honest conversations help build a strong foundation without unnecessary pressure.

2. Give Each Other Space

Allowing personal growth within the relationship strengthens the bond without forcing it.

3. Accept Each Other for Who You Are

Instead of trying to change each other, embrace the differences and celebrate individuality.

4. Trust the Process

Not every relationship will follow a traditional timeline, and that’s okay. Trusting the journey makes love more enjoyable.

What We Can Learn from Justin Hartley’s Approach to Marriage

1. A Happy Marriage Isn’t About Perfection

It’s about finding someone who complements you without forcing a connection.

2. Love Should Feel Easy

That doesn’t mean there won’t be challenges, but the core of the relationship should be effortless.

3. Self-Love is Key

Before you can have a fulfilling relationship, you need to be happy with yourself.

Conclusion: The Beauty of Letting Love Happen Naturally

Justin Hartley’s words serve as a reminder that the best relationships happen naturally. Forcing love or marriage can lead to stress and dissatisfaction, while allowing things to unfold organically creates a stronger and more fulfilling connection. If you’re in a relationship, take a step back and ask yourself: Are we growing naturally together, or are we forcing something that doesn’t feel right?

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