Grey’s Anatomy introduced fans to the iconic Meredith Grey, but it also introduced them to the swoon-worthy Derek Shepherd. The pair were presented as the show’s most desirable couple, making them one of the best TV couples of the 21st century. Even though he exited the show in 2015, fans still reminisce about his time on screen.
Yet, due to the advent of streaming, fans have noticed that McDreamy is not as attractive as they once thought he was. When rewatching the show, a lot of audiences find his behavior deplorable and wonder why a woman like Meredith was obsessed with chasing after him. As such, fans are eager to take off their rose-tinted glasses and see Dr. Shepherd for who he truly is.
He Cheated on Addison with Meredith
Season 1, Episode 9, “Who’s Zoomin’ Who?”
Season 1 introduces MerDer quickly, and at first, things seem pretty sweet. Yet, everything changes in “Who’s Zooming Who?” when Derek’s wife, Addison Montgomery, strolls through the doors of Seattle Grace. Thus, audiences quickly realize that he’s been unfaithful to his wife and his colleague.
Derek Shepherd (Patrick Dempsey) stands against a wall in his white coat in Grey’s Anatomy.
The show tries to make Derek seem innocent in this case, particularly because their marriage broke down due to Addison having an affair. However, fans must remember that Dr. Shepherd is a fully grown man, so he shouldn’t be afraid to discuss his circumstances with Meredith. Overall, a lot of fans just believe that Derek just enjoyed playing two bombshells at the same time.
Punched Mark for Dating Lexie
Season 5, Episode 16, “An Honest Mistake”
Eric Dane’s Mark Sloan leaning in for a kiss with Chyler Leigh’s Lexie Grey in Grey’s Anatomy.Image via ABC
Mark and Lexie’s relationship was undeniably cute, but Derek still seemed to take issue with it. While Mark tried to soften the blow and assured Derek that the pair were genuinely happy, Dr. Shepherd believed that the best thing to do at that moment was to punch him in the face. Thus, the pair end up in a scrap in the middle of the hospital.
The pair have a very complicated history, but violence is never the answer, especially in a hospital. This scene confirms that Derek has very little control over his emotions and rarely faces any major consequences for his outbursts. Plus, the fact that he feels that he can tell Mark what he is allowed to do seems very controlling.
Whacked Meredith’s Engagement Ring With a Bat
Season 5, Episode 17, “I Will Follow You Into the Dark”
Meredith and Derek write their wedding vows on a blue Post-it note in Grey’s Anatomy.Image by Disney
One of the most bizarre things Derek has ever done is hit Meredith’s engagement ring into the woods with a baseball bat. After dealing with an intense bout of depression, Shepherd begins to push everyone away. Even when Meredith confronts him about his plans to propose to her, he erupts into a fit of rage and tells her that if she wants the ring, she’ll have to go into the woods to find it.
On the one hand, it’s very easy for fans to see that Derek is at his wits’ end. However, the way he screams at Meredith when she’s clearly trying to help him is really disturbing. To make matters worse, Meredith doesn’t see anything wrong with his reaction and promises that she’s not going to leave him in this state when she probably should.
He Suggested That Meredith Would Be a Bad Mother
Season 7, Episode 22, “Unaccompanied Minor”
Derek and Meredith look down disappointed at a negative pregnancy test in Grey’s Anatomy. Image via ABC
When the news that Meredith tampered with her Alzheimer’s trial comes to light, Derek is understandably very angry. However, he transforms this professional issue into a personal criticism very quickly. When Meredith claims that not everything is not as simple as good or bad, Derek says that maybe he doesn’t want to have a baby with someone with those types of morals.
Even for fans who idolize Derek, this is a low blow. It’s clear from the start that Meredith has issues with the idea of motherhood because of her relationship with Ellis. Thus, it could be argued that Derek said this just to rub salt into the wound and upset her on purpose.
He Viewed His Career as More Important Than Meredith’s
Season 11, Episode 8, “Risk”
Dr. Mark Sloan and Dr. Derek Shepherd discussing treatment plan for patient with Owen Hunt at Seattle GraceImage via ABC
In Season 11, Derek Shepherd’s brain-mapping research catches the President’s eye, and he’s asked to move to D.C. to continue his work. But, with Meredith and Zola settled in Seattle, he finds it difficult to break the news to them. However, he doesn’t try to propose that moving to DC would be a good change for all of them. Instead, he just focuses on how it would better his research.
While Derek is obviously Meredith’s senior at work, he sometimes lets that power struggle seep into their marriage. He refuses to see Meredith as his equal and often views his research as more important than hers. Not only is this a sign of an awful boss, but it also highlights his selfish qualities as a husband.
Kissed Renee While He Was Still With Meredith
Season 11, Episode 17, “With or Without You”
Derek’s move to D.C. obviously put a lot of strain on his marriage, but the fact that he was unfaithful to Meredith is inexcusable. After making a breakthrough in their research, Derek and his fellow, Renee Collier, shared an intimate kiss. Although Shepherd was quick to pull away, it doesn’t hide the fact that he cheated on the woman who had stood by him through everything.
A lot of fans find Derek’s fling with Renee a tad ironic. In the beginning, Derek resented Addison so much for cheating on him, and perhaps holds those negative opinions towards all women. Yet, when he does a similar thing, he expects to be forgiven and understood straight away.
It seems that the team at Grey Sloan spends more time sleeping together instead of actually doing any work. Yet, when Derek criticizes Meredith for having consensual sex with other men, he crosses a line both personally and professionally. Luckily, Meredith is quick to shut him down and says that he has no right to “call her a whore.”
At that moment, some may find Derek protective, but in reality, he’s being obsessive. Meredith can sleep with whoever she wants to because she’s a grown woman with no other commitments. But, because Derek wants her all to himself, it comes across like he wants his cake and to eat it too.
He Blamed Owen for the Plane Crash
Season 9, Episode 11, “The End Is the Beginning Is the End”
The Seattle Grace Five After the Plane Crash in Grey’s AnatomyImage via ABC
The plane crash altered the course of Grey’s Anatomy forever, so it’s understandable that Derek would be utterly devastated. However, when the lawsuit comes in, Derek is quick to blame Owen for the incident because he changed the airline at the last minute. Obviously, in the throes of grief, everybody says irresponsible things, but once again, he takes things too far.
It’s hard to have any sort of respect for Derek Shepherd when he continues to act like this. Not only does he struggle to accept responsibility for his own actions, but he’s quick to put the blame on everyone else. So, instead of being a good boss and helping his staff through this difficult time, he just wants to bully them unnecessarily.
From the very first scene, fans see Meredith and Derek together. Even though Grey assures that it’s a one-night stand, audiences quickly gain the impression that the pair will eventually become an item. Yet, even after having sex, Derek doesn’t tell Meredith that he’s married.
Even when they learn that they will be working together, Derek makes no mention of his wife or that he’s in the process of getting a divorce. Thus, it’s clear that he wanted to keep this a secret so that it wouldn’t deter Meredith from sleeping with him. So from the get-go, fans realize that McDreamy has a habit of being dishonest.
His Moodiness Was Unbearable
Season 7, Episode 1, “With You I’m Born Again”
While this may seem like a very generalized statement, a lot of fans would agree that Derek is frequently in a bad mood. Even after receiving psychiatric help in Season 7, he struggles to see the bigger picture. While it’s understandable that he would feel traumatized after the shooting, he doesn’t do enough to be strong for his team.
